To be grounded is something I think most people take for granted, including myself. Gravity is a luxury most people have and do not even realize. Although, I must admit, I feel as though I just got pushed out of a space shuttle and I am spinning rapidly out of control. I reach for the ground only to realize the more I stretch to reach for safety, the further away I become. I have no gravity, no center to hold me down. When I look around I know logically there is the beauty of the bright stars, the moons and planets, but I cannot stop spinning long enough to focus. My stomach is queasy from all the motion and my heart feels as though it is going to pop out of my chest.
I look around me for help and realize a few people in the distance. What is this they are wearing? Space suits? Why don’t I have that? They seem so grounded, put together and well quite frankly, they are not spinning out of control. I try to sway my arms to move in their direction only to realize it spins me more violently out of control. I start running only to see I am in mid-air spinning in circles burning all my energy and getting no where. Can no one see me! Why do I not have their same suit?! Maybe I will yell…this will get their attention! Not before long I have people around me; they are discussing their journeys to the next galaxies. Their plans of building the next space shuttle. The beauty of the bright, brilliant stars that encompass us in every direction. Completely unaware that I do not have their suits on, they just tell me to stop spinning madly round. I myself am questioning how to stop the spinning, why my stomach is constantly hurting and why I now cannot see they stars, I just see a bright light that blinds my eyes as my body spins faster and faster out of control. They do not understand. The more I try to explain that I need help and I can not just “stop” spinning the more frustrated I become, because to the by-standers the task at hand should be simple and believe me it is. But without help and the proper medications, diet, doctors, therapy, sleep, job, money situation and friendships it is near impossible. Living is a task for someone struggling with Bipolar and constantly trying to stabilize meds, now add the tasks of “actual” living and you have created a difficult feat. Take me back to my shuttle or give me a suit that works because Bipolar can be unbearable at times…
~This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
The Other Side of Me 
This is such an amazing description – I’ve often described that I feel like I’m attached to the world by a thread, spinning out in the universe. I’ve never been able to put it in words like you describe. Thanks so much for sharing it – wishing you strength and good things,
k8